A day in the life…

clock

I know that ya’ll have been wondering what my ‘typical’ day might look like.  “How does AGMA pass the time?” is a question you probably ask yourself on a daily basis.

Understandable.

Let’s use today as an example of a typical, dysfunctional day in my life.

While my day usually starts around 6:30 AM or 7:00 AM, I slept in a bit.  What??  But I had good reason.  Last night Hubs and I went to see….

…wait for it…

Jon Stewart and Dave Chappelle!  Yeah – THAT Jon Stewart and THAT Dave Chappelle.

With special guests Michelle Wolfe of the 2018 White House Correspondence Dinner fame and Chris Tucker of the Rush Hour movie franchise fame.

AGMA stayed up way too late gaffawing the night away.  But it was epic!

At 7:20 this morning, our cats, Gux and Max, made it known that they were over this sleeping nonsense, and that I needed to get up chop chop and feed them.  I went back to bed after depositing kibble in their bowls.

I got up again at 8:00 to clean up some food that Max puked up.  On our bedspread.

Delightful.

Hubs and I discovered about 20 minutes later that the REST of the food expelled by Max was in a huge pile on our bed sheet in between our pillows.  Glad I didn’t try to shimmy over to snuggle Hubs.

Double delightful.

With the washing machine now swishing in the background, AGMA got ready for the day.  This required I look in the mirror which is always a shocking proposition in the morning.

Washed, brushed, curled and flossed, it was time to take care of some work stuff.

My little Ebay business is picking up again so I needed to get a package ready to ship.  4 English china teacups and saucers.  Scary.  I know I used too much bubble wrap.  AGMA’s  anal in that way.

With the package sealed and labeled, now I needed to figure out if I had enough time to go to the USPO before my physical therapy appointment.

My appointment was in 40 minutes.  I still hadn’t had breakfast, the post office is 15 minutes away, then another 25 to my PT appt.

Just enough time if I grab a banana, put in a mobile order at Starbucks for a mocha, and get all green lights.

Unknown…how long of a line there would be at the Post Office.

AGMA’s always willing to roll the dice.

All green lights?  Not nearly, but there was no line in the USPO and I managed to avoid some accident brouhaha near Starbucks.

I got to my 11:00 AM appointment at precisely 10:59 AM.

It’s a charmed life!

My PT specializes in spine issues.  This is good since I recently found out I have a nasty case of scoliosis in my lumbar spine.  Really nasty.

Bummer.

But it explains a lot.  Since February, running has caused me a lot of hip pain and, later at night, radiating pain down my entire right leg.  Really ouchy stuff.  Difficult to get comfortable.  And I was limping like Chester on Gunsmoke (not everybody’s going to get that reference…)

This has been cause for concern.  I’m supposed to run 26.2 miles in early October as a charity runner.  Friends and family have donated over $2100 to the cause.

AGMA. Must. Run.

Exercises over the course of several weeks proved unsuccessful, so last week my PT tried “dry needling”.  Yeah – it’s just like it sounds…

He exposed my cellulite infested right buttock and proceeded to poke needles into my hindquarters.  It’s sort of like acupuncture, but the needles go deeper and into muscle tissue.

AGMA only yelped twice.

THEN he hooked some of the needles up to an electrical current.  He let my rear end pulsate for 15 minutes.  It felt like simmering butt stew.

But it helped immensely.  There are still some sensations down my leg, but no hip pain during my runs.  And my limp is still there, but it’s much reduced.

So AGMA showed up to my PT appointment today and said, “Bring it on!”

Because there’s been a bit of numbness in my right foot the past few days, he put even MORE needles in this week.  And he turned the current up so that, every now and then, one of my lateral rotator muscles in my rear would start to jiggle.  Like jello.  Cellulite jello.

AGMA kinda wanted a cigarette afterwards.

I’d love to have a picture of the whole set-up, but couldn’t figure out how to ask him without him thinking I was a bit of a freak.

Maybe next week I’ll try a selfie.  Of my butt with needles sticking out and little electrodes hooked up to them.

I am a freak.

And now I’m at Dancing Goats reading blogs, making comments, answering comments and writing this post.

Cats puking on the bed, speeding to the Post Office, shoving a banana down at a stoplight for sustenance, getting electrified needles stuck in my rear, blogging….

Pretty much a typical day for AGMA.

Aging Gracefully My Ass (literally…)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Advertisements

20 thoughts on “A day in the life…

    • It was a much quieter day after I wrote Shelley. It’s New Mexico Hatch chili time and a local taqueria does these amazing dishes with Hatch chilies (a pot pie, a relleno, tacos) so we went there with friends that night and pigged out on chilies. Not low fat or low calories (the relleno’s are stuffed with cheese, coated in panko and deep fried), but it was heaven!!

      Liked by 1 person

    • Brave…I love it! And thanks…I’m really hoping the PT ultimately helps. I had 2 pain free runs last week but my 20 mile run/walk on Saturday was not so good – ouch! But I feel like things are “settling down” – it might take a few weeks but I really think that it’s going to be okay. My run this morning was totally pain free. Go figure…

      Liked by 1 person

  1. My first thoughts at the beginning of this post was, “Thank heavens I don’t have a cat” and “Good thing the dog isn’t allowed on the bed.” My next thoughts were ….. hm, can’t remember. All I can think about is how bad MY hip and leg hurt and wondering whether or not that PT guy is cute. Is he? I probably could use some jiggling in my right butt. You could come, too, and we could take pictures of each other. Oh wait, that’s just plane weird. Never mind.

    Liked by 2 people

    • The PT guy is okay. He’s an “older” gentleman (older compared to most of the PTs in that practice.) He looks to be in his 50s. Which is why I think he’s so good – he’s been around the block a few times and knows his stuff! You should look into dry needling if you’re having hip issues! It’s made a HUGE difference for me. Yeah – group PT with butt jiggling and photos…weird. But nobody ever said we were normal! 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  2. What a day! Your story about the electrodes cracks me up. About 20 years ago I was getting some PT for a rotator cuff injury. After my first session they hooked me up to a machine that electrically stimulated my arm muscles. The therapist turned on the machine, adjusted the dial and said, “If that isn’t enough stimulation you can increase the setting on the dial.” I asked how to know how far to go and she said, “Stop when it hurts.” Left unsupervised, and being the curious type, I started adjusting the knob. 15 minutes later the therapist checked in on me and freaked out. I had the dial up to 28 and my arm was flopping around in my lap. She turned the setting down to 7 and asked what was wrong with me. I told her that I had been an electrician for 30 years and that I have been hit much harder than that with electricity. That was my last day with that machine (or anything else involving electrical stimulation).

    Hang in there, AGMA, and leave the adjustments to the professionals.
    Ω

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Sounds like a rough one but I admire your hootspa in continuing signing up for run. Here’s my share: Once, while “cupping,” my spine, acupuncturist accidentally set my hair on fire. Smelled smoke, sudden heat on shoulder. Went home, slapped organic/raw honey on shoulder burn. Amazing. Did the trick. Life is full of surprises.

    Liked by 1 person

    • That is CRAZY!! But how did your hair catch on fire? Did she use an open flame on the cups or her needles or something like that? What did she say to you after you put out your hair? I’m picturing a scene out of I Love Lucy! And thanks for the tip on the honey! I had no idea!
      P.S. Did the cupping/acupuncture help even though you caught on fire?

      Like

      • It IS a scene out of I Love Lucy. Luckily, just the tips of my hair picked up on the acupuncturist’s lit match. He apologized profusely — said this never happened in all his years of practice. He’s a good acupuncturist and I still see him. But the only cup I want around me now is a cup of Joe from my French press (with a sprinkle of cinnamon).

        Liked by 1 person

  4. You’re lucky your cat waited until 8:00 to yak up its food. Mine usually hawks up a hairball at 4:30 in the morning. I’ll hear him making retching noises and I have to fly out of bed in the dark to find him before he does it on the living room rug. Sometimes he’s under my bed and I have to grab him by the tail and pull him out. Good times…

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Pingback: What’s your number? | Aging Gracefully My Ass

Talk to me...

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s