So I wrote a post last week while I was in the waiting room of a local gastroenterology practice. Hubs was in the process of getting a colonoscopy. I thought it would be a good idea to write about his prep.
Lucky for you, I came to my senses.
So…no post last week.
AGMA is out of control again.
I just got home on Monday from the first of what will be three long weekends away. Between February 24th and March 13th, I will be home for a grand total of 3 days. Three days.
Out. Of. Control.
Last weekend, I did a half marathon in Florida. I drove down with a friend and stayed at her 80 year old mother’s home. Her mom was a wild woman cut out of the same AGMA cloth as yours truly. It was a great time.
And I loved watching my friend’s mother “mothering” her. It’s been about 25 years since I have been “mothered”…I forgot how (mostly) wonderful it was. It made AGMA really miss her step-mother. And feel a bit guilty that I didn’t appreciate her as much as I should have before first Alzheimer’s then the Grim Reaper stole her away from all of us.
Tomorrow, I go to Puerto Vallarta, Mexico.
I know I’m nuts, but this is a trip AGMA really doesn’t want to take. I committed to it last fall before life took a turn for the cray cray. It’s an el cheapo trip – a friend is renting the condo and invited me to come along gratis. And I’m using airline miles to get there. And I don’t think it will be terribly expensive once I get there.
But it’s six days I’d rather be doing something else other than sitting in the sun and walking along the ocean.
Huh? I know that 98% of you think I’m nuts. And you would be right…
I get back on Tuesday next week, then leave on Thursday for Chicago to hang out with B & V (my very hip, awesome grandchildren.) This trip, I very much want to take. Always.
But I will be missing a long run that Saturday. So AGMA has to make it up because I’m signed up for another full marathon on 4/2. Yeah – I’m nuts.
I’m planning on running 20 miles by myself the Monday after I get back.
Right now, it feels like I’m running through grape jelly when I run. I’ve never been fast, but my half marathon time last weekend was abysmal considering it was a relatively cool day and the course was pancake flat.
I blame the prednisone and the shingles. And the grand Cheeto-head. Of course.
Prednisone update… My GI guy wants me to take the low dose I’m on for another 17 days. I’ve been on prednisone since early December. Don’t tell him, but AGMA’s planning on only taking it for another 10 days. Shhhhh…
I’m so over it.
Shingles update… The rash is gone with nothing but discolored areas remaining. Again, TMI. But now I’m experiencing what they call Postherpetic Neuralgia. Yuck.
Postherpetic Neuralgia is when the nerves in the area of the rash fire on their own. And often. According to Dr. Diagnoseanythingontheinternet, this condition can last anywhere from a few weeks to forever.
AGAM’s rooting for the ‘few weeks’ option.
The weird thing is that I’m not experiencing pain. I’m getting an intense tingling, itchy, ticklish sensation. Like really intense. Like so intense that I feel compelled to scratch and rub the area.
This has been somewhat embarrassing since the rash was on my left buttocks, left hip and left pubic bone area. You get the idea…
Oh la la.
I read that a topical lotion with capsaisin in it can help relieve the sensations. Capsaisin is what makes hot peppers hot. It somehow blocks the nerve signals to the brain.
So basically AGMA would be rubbing a red habanero on her crotch.
Let’s do this. Sounds like fun.
I had a corporate chair massage gig yesterday. Since didn’t want to be constantly itching and rubbing my nether regions during the job, I decided to try a topical capsaisin product.
I used the applicator to rub it on. I wasn’t sure the lotion was flowing so I made sure I put extra on. Alllllll the way from my spine to just above my pubic bone in front. I covered it good. Real good.
Turns out, this was not a wise thing to do.
Round about 30 minutes into the job, the itching and ticklish feelings were intensified and joined by a burning sensation. Like a 13 year old middle school male, I couldn’t keep my hands off of myself.
At one point, I managed to take a peek at my waist. It was bright red. I mean, fire engine red.
Yesterday is now in the top 10 list of AGMA’s most uncomfortable moments. Ever.
Too much capsaisin can actually cause burns on the skin. AGMA thought she was SOL.
But then an amazing thing happened. After nearly 3 hours of extreme discomfort, it suddenly went away. Poof, goodbye.
No more itching. No more tickling. No more pain.
When I got home, I checked out “the area” and all the redness was gone. Poof, goodbye.
AGMA felt like she did in the good old days before shingles. Like four weeks ago.
The itching and tickley feeling came back around 9 PM last night. Damn. But not as intensely as it had been.
AGMA looked at the little bottle of the topical capsaisin by the sink. With fresh memories of intense itching, extreme discomfort and semi-burning flesh, I decided to take extra ibuprofen instead.
As the old saying goes, sometimes the “cure is worse than the disease”.
I’m wondering if the Russians might like my almost full bottle of capsaisin lotion to use in their political prisoner interrogation program.
They’ll talk. Oh yes – they’ll talk.
AGMA guarantees it.